Watching someone you care about struggle with alcohol use can leave you feeling helpless and confused. You might notice changes in their behavior, health problems, or difficulties managing work and relationships. These signs suggest your friend might need help.
You want to support them, but you might not know where to start. Here are three concrete steps you can take to help an alcoholic friend.
Steps To Help a Friend Struggling With Alcohol Use
1. Have a Conversation
Starting the conversation about alcohol use is often the hardest step. Choose a time when your friend is sober and you can talk privately without interruptions. Express your concerns using “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory.
For example, you might say, “I’ve noticed you’ve been drinking more lately, and I’m worried about you,” rather than “You drink too much.”
Listen to what they have to say without judgment. Remember that denial is common, and your friend might not be ready to acknowledge there’s a problem yet. The initial conversation doesn’t always result in immediate change, but it opens the door for future discussions about getting help.
2. Offer To Help
Ask how you can support them. This might mean driving them to appointments, helping them find treatment options, or simply being available to talk. Small offers of help show you care and are committed to supporting their recovery journey.
Be specific about the help you can provide, such as researching treatment centers or attending support meetings with them. Having concrete options makes it easier for your friend to accept help. Your willingness to take action shows that recovery isn’t a path they need to walk alone, which often provides the confidence they need to take that first step.
3. Take Care of Yourself
Supporting someone with alcohol problems can be emotionally draining. Set boundaries about what you can and cannot do. Connect with support groups for friends and family members of people with alcohol use disorder.
Remember that you cannot force someone to change. Your friend must want help for recovery to work. Focus on what you can control — your own actions and responses. Many people spend years trying to “fix” a loved one while neglecting their own well-being, which ultimately helps no one. Your stability is important both for your health and for being an effective support person.
Finding Support Services for Your Friend
When your friend is ready for help, professional support makes a huge difference. A professional alcohol intervention can be an effective way to show your friend how their drinking affects them and their loved ones. These structured conversations, guided by professionals, create a safe environment for everyone to express concerns and present treatment options.
Research shows that professional treatment significantly increases the chances of long-term recovery compared to trying to quit without support. Each person’s recovery path looks different, so work with your friend to find the approach that fits their unique needs and circumstances.
Tips for Having the Conversation
When discussing your friend’s alcohol use, choose a moment when they’re sober and open to conversation. Focus on specific behaviors rather than making judgments, and share how their drinking affects you and others. Be ready for resistance or denial, as these are common responses. Have information about getting help, but don’t overwhelm them initially. Stay calm, even if the conversation is tough, and highlight that your concern is based on care, not criticism. Even if the first talk doesn’t go well, you’ve still planted a seed that may grow later.
Taking the First Step Toward Recovery
Recovery from alcohol use disorder is possible with the right support, and no one has to face this challenge alone. If someone you care about is struggling with alcohol use, call Drew Horowitz & Associates at (800) 731-0854 or contact us online to schedule professional intervention services.
